Originally published on Thumpcity.com

Surviving Survivor

Who cares? I mean--really--why do we subject ourselves to the vicarious experiences of fishbowl fame-seeking money-hungry idiots???!! It's sparked conversation across the nation the likes of which is rivalled only by Regis' wardrobe and those wacky "Real World" kids in New Orleans. They've even got a Mormon this time...Oooooh.... And let's not forget Darva Conger who went to the Andy Warhol School of Fame. Former alumni include Fawn Hall and Donna Rice. But D.C. will be forgotten and so will all of the Survivor folks who are eating grubs and rats and other fun insects and vermin all in the hopes of winning the big prize.

I'm sorry but the whole premise is so bizarre and sick I don't even know where to begin. Why don't they just all sell their souls to Beelzebub and get it over with already? Is it the cash or the limelight or the exhibitionist tendencies a la Ricki, Maury, and Jerry that pushes these people to strut around clad in Targetwear performing subhuman stunts? Where's the dignity? The integrity? The humanity? Don't these people have parents? Were they raised by wolves? No--can't be that--wolves have MUCH more in the common sense department. Publicity is a god worshipped by Americans and we are willing to leave our spirits at the altar of a sound bite to become water-cooler fodder. I think I'm moving to France.

Why are we so sucked in? What constitutes entertainment? Do we keep pushing the envelope further and further until it falls off the edge of the world and our collective sanity goes with it? All jokes aside, it IS a disturbing trend and I wonder that more folks don't rant about it. At the risk of sounding like an overzealous televangelist I have to yearn for the presence of some sense of, if not morality, then ethics. I wonder if Socrates would have his own talk show or infomercial. I wonder if Jesus would've become a made-for-TV movie. But most of all I wonder where this black hole that sucks all that is holy came from. It's like aliens of yore in the War of the Worlds era have really come down and vacuumed our brains dry. Am I on a Twilight Zone episode where I'm the only one who sees this? Somebody pinch me...but please..not on National TV.

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